Enter the Dragon Fruit
Let me take you back to last week. Dear Wife has just come home from the store, and is unloading the groceries while I am watching B.T.
“I got you a dragon,” she says.
Of course, I am intrigued. The word “dragon” is typically reserved to describe only things that are awesome. But what could she have gotten at the grocery store that would attain to such heights of awesomeness as to be called a dragon?
It was not long until the groceries were appropriately put away, and the truth was revealed.
“It’s called a dragon fruit,” says dear wife, again. I am still intrigued. It is one of the most unusual fruit I have ever seen. You can see, right away, why it is called a dragon fruit.
I am calling this post, humorously, a review – because I am going to share with you the experience of eating a dragon fruit. The exterior of the fruit is bright red with scales that suggest the fruit’s namesake.
It’s intimidating, scary even. (Note that the pictured dragon fruit is scarier than the actual fruit I consumed – the scaly spines were snipped away on ours.) A sibling had recently had dragon fruit, and described it as “sweet”. The internet promised that it tasted something like a cross between a kiwi and a pear, and that it was sweet and soft, pulpy, and juicy. It sounded promising.
But we have only just begun our amazing journey. While the fruit is indeed frightening and draconic in appearance, the interior of the fruit offers new surprises: a white and seedy meat that suggests a pale kiwi. This is promising, since the fruit was praised as being kiwi-like in flavor.
So, I carefully extracted the fruit from the inedible red shell, cut it into bite-size pieces, and and served some to Dear Wife and some to myself.
And now comes the hard truth. The internet did not entirely lie when it suggested that dragon fruit tasted like a cross between kiwi and pear. The truth, however, is that it tastes like a cross between a kiwi, a pear, and a large mass of flavorless, papery pulp. Which is to say, it had a very weak flavor, and was mostly water and a peculiar texture. The tiny seeds in the thing gave one the uncomfortable sensation of biting into a colony of crunchy little insects.
All in all, in truth, it wasn’t a bad experience. But neither was it anything even approaching moderately good. It was at times unpleasant due to the texture, but ultimately the dragon fruit was mostly bland and flavorless. I think Dear Wife summarized it best when she said, after having finished her last bite of Dragon Fruit:
“I don’t think I’ll be buying this again.”
What about you? Have you recently consumed any strange or exotic fruits or vegetables? Share your sordid tales in the comments.